onerous | IC Inbox

You'll have to ask someone else.

[Yuri knew death. Yuri knew him. The girl could piece two and two together but Neji felt a twinge of regret when sending that.

Stupid CereVice.]

How did it go with you?

I see.

[She could, too. A lot of people had died on that... mission? Adventure??; him being added to the body count wasn't too surprising, though she'd hoped otherwise.

Neji might be playing vague, but Yuri wasn't going to. It's easier doing it over text]

We were in a prison. There were a lot of spirits, but they couldn't tell me much; they'd been dead a long time and they'd forgotten a lot. I helped them move on, with the help of another girl. I thought I could learn something, but most of them starved to death. [And she'd woken up wanting to eat everything and feeling sick to her stomach. Fun times.]

Whatever was down there wasn't happy about us setting the prisoners free, even after death. It killed me and the other girl instantly. [She types that and then stares at the words for a long moment. Died. She'd died.

It was real, she knew it was, and she'd talked about it enough with Rei and Yu and Merlin. But somehow, seeing it written down, it was like a shock all over again. She'd been dead for three days.

She forces herself to continue] It all happened so fast. The other three were killed shortly after us. We learned a few things, but I'm not sure if it was enough to be worth it.

I wish I could've done more, I suppose.

[This was frustrating. So much so that a pained little noise escapes him, and Neji once again damns his own being. For fuck's sake, though-- were the spirits different from the things his own group had encountered? A different population of

who cared, though? It killed the living; it makes Neji snap his head up and look off in the direction Lee's room was-- so add this to the ever-growing list of things to never breathe a word about. Yuri might have already said it. That made no difference in his duty to shut his trap about it.

He lets the message sit a few minutes. Stupid text function. This was easier with words spoken face to face, then you knew when to charge forward or pull the reins.

No.

No of course the captors didn't want the prisoners free, not even after death.

That was how it worked, right? Power was power, and who would ever give it up?]

There were 5 total in my group. We woke in a dungeon and there were levels below and above us. We were driven into a hall by creatures that resembled bats and we had no way to return to where we started.

[Possibly the only thing that was not his fault-- and still a lie. He could have made a hole in the rubble that'd caved in on them. He was sure.]

The hall led downward and we found a room that housed rows of caskets. We were freezing.

[Literally freezing. It sounded stupid. It was all... so, so stupid.]

With nothing else to do but die we decided to open one with someone suggesting they might learn about the colony's history. There was nothing we could see and what must have been a spirit.

It killed me and I assume the others as well. [Look, he doesn't know for sure. Doesn't know their names. But he's pretty sure he screwed them over because he'd heard the damned thing scream.]

Why should death mean something more to them than to us?

[She taps her fingers against the device, considering. Wondering. How does she respond? 'I'm sorry' sounds so cheap, so useless. She moves to flop onto her side on the couch, curling up and staring at the the text. She reads over it--once, twice, thrice.]

I wonder how many people died. [Either in the groups, or in those places. A lot of groups seemed to run into ghosts.] So far there's no answers. Just more questions. Typical.

The ones in the prison starved to death mostly, I think. It was a lot of memories and feelings all at once. My stomach still hurts.

[The phantom pains of starvation; she's hungry, but looking or smelling food makes her feel nauseous. It's finally starting to fade away, but even now she was just nibbling on crackers to keep her stomach calm. Fun.

It killed me, he says. She stares at the words. 'Again?' she almost asks.]

I didn't know death would be like that. I don't know what to think now. [It had been something she sought, a fine line she tread between wanting to live or die, and it had been tipped. She'd experienced both but was no closer to making a decision on this than she had been before.]

Did you come back alright? I know sometimes coming back means some kind of 'penalty.'

[Wait a minute--]

Using your powers hurts you?

[He'd seen her clutch a hand to her stomach after she'd seen his memory of death, and had dismissed it an unconscious twitch of the fingers.

...gods, though, it hurt her? Reliving the deaths of others hurt Yuri? And suddenly his stomach hurts.

He doesn't know what to write back. His mind's blank and it's not peace that fills it.]

I'm fine. [Coming back was a penalty in itself. --no, that's just melodramatic. Maybe. Damn.] Nothing's changed with me if that's what you mean. [And there's a voice in his head saying that if there's a penalty, he'd like to know what he'd be dealing with. Neji doesn't fret about it; it's always been with him and he always got his answer- the genius of goddamn Hyuga. Keep pushing your luck and eventually--]

Death is simple. Coming back isn't.

[Oh.

Yeah.

That's not really common knowledge, is it? She never thought to explain it exactly and she feels a little guilty.] Yes. I feel everything the person felt when I experience their memories or their deaths. [She's quiet a moment, wondering if there's anything she can say to make this better--] When it's a spirit like that, taking on their suffering puts their souls at rest and allows them to move on. It's a small price to pay to help. [-- Well probably not that.

Oh Well.]

I'm glad you're alright. [There's nothing more to say there, she figures. He's right, obviously, in more ways than one.]

[No-]

I'm sorry.

[The bridge of his nose is stinging and his throat is feeling sour and falling back on his bed to rest the tension in his back and shoulders is all he can do to keep the world from spinning.

And well- damn, he already sent that message and isn't sure he can get it back.

So Neji's glad this exchange is through text and all its irritating, infuriating quirks. He doesn't feel so ashamed to suck in a deep breath and close his eyes for a second. Just a second.

Had he already asked if she was fine? What if he pressed Send again, while scrolling through older messages? --he hates this.] You're braver than I'd ever be. [He sends it anyway.] Do you need anything?

[She feels oddly embarrassed by both the apology and the praise. It's nothing to apologize for--] It's not your fault.

[And it's not, it's really not. She looks away and sighs. Brave? Everyone keeps telling her that but...] Just a friend. You're doing a good job.

[It feels strange still to consciously refer to people as friends. But, well, they call each other by their first names so they must be some sort of close even if they're prickly at each other]

But really, don't be sorry. I used to hate this power, but lately I've found ways to make it useful. I can't complain about that.

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